Makeup & muscle….and a scrawny baby

 

Let me get the most obvious part out of the way and say I am melting and dying in this heat. My body is used to being confined to dark places and it is unfair that such heat should penetrate through the curtains and fry me in my own solitary confinement, forcing me to leave my room and socialise with my family downstairs. I kid. I don’t particularly like summer, though. I like waking up naturally because it’s too warm. I like being able to go out without fear of wearing innapropriate material for rain. But other than that, it’s a big fat no. I like winter and everything it brings. I love when it gets dark early. I love the rain, I love storms. I adore sleeping with 387 blankets whilst the rain slams on my window, and I especially like having marshmallows and mint tea by the fireplace with Harry Potter on the TV. Maybe it’s my tendency to be a control freak that means I love how I control how I feel in the winter. Too cold? No problem, wear more layers. Raining? No problem, wear a hood or carry an umbrella. But when it’s too hot, what do you do? Rip your skin off? When it’s too hot and you become tired, what do you do? WHAT DO YOU DO. So without further ado, before this turns into a complaint against the sun, let me end this weather rant by stating that the only good thing about heatwaves are the thunderstorms that follow, and let me tell you I cannot find the words to express just how much I love them. With my face 30 centimetres away from a fan, let the waiting game begin. [UPDATE: at the time of posting this, it is past midnight and WE HAVE A THUNDERSTORM PEOPLE. MY DAY IS SWELL EVERYTHING IS GRAND.]

I’ve made very clear that I have much to complain about the summer, and watch out for a post regarding stupid comments from stupid people on facebook who talk about Muslim women and the sun and oppression blah blah blah. But for now, I’m going to post a nicely opintionated, non rage fuelled sort of review post. Things I like. Nice and simple. These are just a few things I like this month, not related to Ramadan unless I say so. Let’s begin.

MAC Velvet Teddy

Let me just get the worst one out of the way. When I say worst, I mean I actually adore this product but I just don’t want to talk about it. I finally strayed away from my beloved taupe (don’t worry, I still have 2), and decided to go a little lighter for the summer. I don’t really have much to say about this other than I like the colour, but definitely try it out before you buy it as I can see it washing some people out. I am literally only talking about this because I stupidly put it in the picture, I have nothing more to say, so…I’m just going to leave it here. *awkwardly walks away whilst crickets cricket away in the background*

 

L.A. Girl Pro conceal

Okay, this is one makeup product I am going to talk about. I’ve read and heart a lot about these concealers, so I decided to suck it up and try it. The store didn’t stock the orange corrector, so I ordered it and had to wait a good few weeks for it to arrive :):):) conveniently, I haven’t actually tried the bottom concealer (Creamy Beige), as I’m waiting for my trusty Fit Me to run out, but you all know what concealer does…the only difference between this and other concealers is consistency and staying power, which I’ll talk about with the other. A quick little note: I would happily go out with no makeup on. I don’t have particularly problem skin, fortunately, but it is just SO UNEVEN. On some days my face looks like a rainbow, so I like to wear tinted moisturizer to even it out a little. Now, to any women who suffer from dark circles that 50 layers of concealer won’t cover, or darkness around the mouth/chin/forehead/wherever area, or just anybody who wants to cancel out dark tones, THIS IS FOR YOU. I don’t think this will work particularly well on people who are extremely fair skinned, but I say throw a couple coins in the way of this and try it anyway. Most importantly, girls/guys, PILING ON THE FOUNDATION WON’T MAKE YOUR FACE LOOK BETTER. You will look grey and/or caked. To get rid of blemishes or dark spots, colour correct. That way you can wear less makeup but have the desired end product. Ta da. Definitely recommend these concealers, they are so cheap and work really well.

 

Optimum Nutrition Whey (Chocolate Mint)

Okay, onto more important stuff. Anybody who knows me knows I never let the kitchen go without a big tub of protein getting in the way of my mum’s bag of potatos or flour. I do, however, with normal shakes or protein shakes, tend to stick with the more boring flavours – banana is my favourite milkshake flavour, and I’ve only known chocolate and strawberry protein. For the record, I don’t care what anybody says, Optimum Nutrition is THE BEST. You cannot get better than gold standard. It mixes well, tastes like a normal milkshake and doesn’t leave my shaker stank. I previously used Reflex, in chocolate, and, whilst it did the job and didn’t taste too bad until you opened your eyes and breathed again, it does not mix well at all. No matter how vigorously I mixed it, there’d always be bits floating around on the top as if I’d want a shit concoction with added surprise nuggets of shit. No thanks. I also used a lot of milk and added nesquik to make it more palatable, and my shaker eventually resisted washing up liquid and I had to throw it out. Needless to say, I quickly left the massive tub with a quarter remaining and switched to ON strawberry. Once that had run out, I turned to my beloved muse, who advised me to move away from this synthetic, fruity chemical mix and buy Chocolate Mint because it “tastes like mint aero”. Obviously, me being the cynic I am I thought this was an exaggeration or a gross attempt to see me suffer through a tub of something disgusting, because let’s be realistic; protein tastes like a bunch of teeny tiny ripped fairies flew into your mouth and took a fat stinky dump on your tongue before sprinkling it with happiness and love. Reflex obviously forgot the sprinkling. I bought the smaller tub, expecting to soon be waiting too long for another delivery of a better flavour but LO AND BEHOLD. One sip and I realised I had found miracle liquid. It literally tastes like a mint aero milkshake with added cream. It is beautiful. Buy, buy, buy. He never fails me.

 

  

Lenny & Larry’s: The Complete Cookie (Snickerdoodle)

During my nutrition shop, my mouse hovered over these fun looking cookies, and being the idiot with no brain that I am, I added them to my cart and bought them. Even though I hate cookies. With 16g of protein, these vegan friendly, all natural non-GMO cookies had me expecting something mediocre at best, but I needed something like this for suhoor considering I don’t actually eat anything. Anybody who has eaten anything high in protein is familiar with that gritty, dry and unsatisfactory texture no matter how delicious it otherwise is. I myself am not fussed with it being vegan, I’d actually prefer it if it wasn’t, but this is obviously a deciding factor for a lot of people, and let me just say, one bite in to this circle of goodness and you are in SOFT CINNAMON HEAVEN. I am the fussiest person ever, and these are so good. They are better than scrawny Millie’s and tasteless cardboard Maryland, and they’re meatier than the chunky cookies you find in stores. Each cookie is 2 servings (haha. ha. ha.), so careful as there is a lot of sugar in it, but definitely buy them because you won’t regret it. I’ll be ordering more soon, maybe in chocolate or lemon… they’re heavy, huge, and are quite floury, but they’re delicious. This is perfect little-less-guilty dessert fix.

 

So, that’s all for now. There are so many other things I want to talk about that aren’t review based, but I was right when I said the fatigue from fasting really takes away all my motivation to write anything…I was halfway through writing this post and I fell asleep. Until next time, I’ll leave you with the lil bebe modelling my minion bottle for me (thanks Slop), reminding you to stay hydrated,

BYE XOX

  


 

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